that's SO last year

First of all, thank you, for all the comments and encouragement and commiseration and "I'm in the midst of it too" on my last post. I seriously still intend to sit down and reply to many of your comments. It has just been hard to find a chunk of time on the computer, or I should rephrase that-- a chunk of "productive" time on the computer. But seriously. Thank you.

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Every year just before the holidays, I tell myself that this is going to be the year that I get my act together and mail out a Christmas card. And every year, I'm determined to not go the route of pre-designed, purchased photocards. I vow that I'll design my own unique, creative version. 

That vow hasn't gotten me very far. It has been more than SIX YEARS I'm guessing since I sent out a Christmas card. And even then, it might have been a baby announcement, not a true holiday greeting. 

But this year, I came to my senses and ordered our Christmas card from tinyprints. Hello? Why had I not been doing this earlier?

card extra

 

But....I was still determined to add our own "flair" to the whole thing so at the very last minute I whipped up a little "best of 2010" to throw in with the card. 

I have to say, I kind of love it. It was so fun making every one come up with their list. Emma had hers finished in five minutes. Dan and I agonized over ours. 

And let me just say, apparently, I don't watch a lot of movies. Coming up with a best movie title for 2010 was painful. I know I saw some good movies. I'm sure I did. But in the end, 3:10 to Yuma was the best I could come up with. I remember it having a really good story line. And Russell Crowe. That makes a good movie, right? 

Anyway, I've been meaning to share our card with all of you. Since I couldn't possibly afford the postage for a card for each of you. :) 

Next year, we plan to add another category for the girls. But I think I'll keep that one under my hat until the end of 2011. 

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livin' on love

film. christmas eve at thomas run

I'm singing the same old, tired tune I've been singing on and off for what feels like years, "money's tight". We sit and talk about all the "unexpected" things, the fuel bills that make me cringe every time I hear the thud of the furnace kicking on under my feet in the dark, damp basement, the repairs, the bills...blah, blah, blah. Blech.

We are fortunate though. We are blessed. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

But for now, we are having to cinch our belts so tight, it is sometimes painful. 

As the main spender in this family, the person who basically controls where, when, how and on what our money is used, I've had to step up and tighten my belt the most. 

And so, the grocery budget is the primary place that I've made major changes. 

To be honest, I can't even remember the last time I went to the grocery store and did a major, formerly-typical shop. I think it was sometime around new year's day. I have been forced to get seriously creative in the kitchen. If I've been to the store, I've been able to carry all my purchases in, with one trip. No loading, unloading, unpacking.

I am using what I have on hand.

I am digging deep, very deep into my pantry shelves.

I'm pulling out cans and boxes and bags of things that I usually pass by and am "not in the mood" for. 

I've forced myself to figure out how to cook up cuts of meat that have been sitting in the bottom of my freezer, looking at me with intimidating eyes.

I've found forgotten goodness stashed in bottom freezer drawers, in the backs of cupboards.

I've discovered that if we want it, oftentimes, I can make it from scratch. Soft pretzels? I have a recipe for that. Warm rolls? I can handle that. Cereal? How about a batch of granola?

I've learned to make the mundane special. Candles at dinner. Cream for oatmeal (again) in tiny pottery pitchers. Dinner tables set with nice dishes and linens.

I've learned to use less meat. To use it for flavor and protein instead of bulk. 

I've learned to make my grocery list and then examine it again. What really is necessity?

I've learned that flour, sugar, butter, milk, cheese, eggs and beans go a long way for a little money.

I've learned that we really need a milk cow.

I've learned (again) that soup makes a great meal and can have so many variations it doesn't get old. Especially with good homemade bread or biscuits.

I've learned that if you let your children get hungry enough, everything looks and tastes good to them!

It's funny, when we first were married, my husband was the best person to cook for. He'd moan and groan and 'ooh' and 'aaah' about my cooking. But over the years, his exclamations have quieted a bit. (He forgets how good he has it.)

But these past few weeks, when we are eating on a shoestring, when I'm putting together meals that are made up strictly from the things I'm finding in my cupboard, those moans and groans have returned. When things are pieced together, whipped up with less, suddenly everything tastes really good. And I have to admit, I've made some pretty good meals, I might even dare to say a few of our best. We sit down at the table and say, "Look what we did with almost nothing!"

film. waffle hill farm, kitchen

I've pushed myself. I've changed my perspective. When I go to the store--we still need milk, cream for coffee and some fresh fruit and veggies now and then--I look at what I buy so differently. Before I buy something I think about how flexible it is, how many meals I can get out of it, how far I can stretch it. 

But don't be fooled, it isn't this daily great experience. I don't go skipping into my kitchen each afternoon, ready to tackle another creative dinner. There are days I'd trade my youngest child for takeout. (kidding! she's too cute and she doesn't add much to the grocery bill.) There are days I stand in front of my open cupboard doors and want to scream, "I'm so sick of this!!!!!!" But in general, I've been up for the challenge. 

I don't know how much longer we'll need to live like this. The state of our cupboards, freezer and refrigerator is pretty Old Mother Hubbard-ish. Eventually, I'll need to replenish. But like I said, there is light at the end of the tunnel. But I need to hang on for a little bit longer.

The good part of all this, is that I feel like my perspective has changed. I've learned a lot about my grocery shopping habits. I've learned that I can do a lot with less. I've learned that we can survive. 

And I've learned that we are rich in so many other ways.

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thoughts on things

the junior mint phone

hello! apparently, i disappeared for quite awhile. and just so you know we're still here, still good, a few catch-up thoughts on things that have been happening the past few weeks....

* we had the first--of what i imagine to be many, many more--recitals. mary's teacher introduced her as "mary. she's six. she's only been taking lessons for a few weeks. and, isn't she so tiny??" mary was brave, confident. and unmistakably flawless in her rendition of "sea whale". 

she's so tiny

* egg production has dropped off with the darker days. we have no electric at the coop, so we don't simulate longer days for the girls with lights. it makes each little egg a gift.

* i don't think i've seen the inside of birdy's mouth in three weeks. her lips are in a constant, sucking-pursed-state, as we wait, and wait and wait for these painful teeth number three and four to emerge. poor babe.

* soccer season ended with many, many tears when the girls lost their final game in the tournament. lots of tears, except for emma. who packed up her gear and walked off the field. i was okay with that. 

DSC_0036

*birdy is army-crawling all over the house. gone are the days of peaceful baby playing on the quilt. this morning, she discovered the little pile of ash in front of the woodstove (the stove was not going) and covered herself in grey dust.

*my mother-in-law came to visit last week. and while she was here, she cleaned my living room and kitchen. not "tidied" but cleaned. i'm not sure if i should accept this as a wonderful gift, or as a sign that my house is a dirty mess. 

*there is a ten-gallon fish tank on the floor of my living room full of pine needles, leaf litter, grasses, dandelion fronds and ONE wooly bear. 

* i am taking a 6 week class at a local gym called, "body conversion". sounds scary, doesn't it? but, each night that i go, i am reminded that there is a big difference between what you think you cannot do, and what you can push yourself to do. those voices in our heads sure like to tell us otherwise. i am loving it.

So, hi! hello! i've missed this place. i make no promises, but i hope to be back here a little more regularly. (famous last words)

 

 

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pause

pause

I took this picture out the car window sunday night, as we were pulling out of the driveway to head to dinner at my grandparents' farm. I was trying to adjust the manual settings on my camera just a bit, remembering that my last photographs had been indoors and that any pictures I took on this evening would be outside.

It turned out that I had a baby on hip most of the time, except for the chance I got to eat hands-free thanks to some helpful family members passing Birdy around among them. And no pictures were taken, but one. On the way out the door to come home. 

But the next morning when I paused to look at this "nothing-special" photograph, I realized how much our place is beginning to look like fall. The warming of the evening light. The garden, bare except for my flowers that hang on until that very first frost and the sweet potato vines tangled at my flower's feet. Clothes on the line again--I confess it was just too hot and humid many days this summer to even think about clothes out on the line. The hostas getting a bit droopy, sad, and pocked with holes. The ground under the rope swing bare to the dirt. A few leaves yellowing and dropping.

I love the changing of seasons. I feel like I come back to life in the fall. Summer often does me in and sucks all the life and creativity and umph out of me. I'm excited to get back in the kitchen. Back outside. I begin to tackle major cleaning projects (ceiling fans, anyone? tub tile? mudroom windows?). 

I hope the changing of seasons is treating you well. I'd love to hear what fall brings to your life. 

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i am home.

hello.

home.

I think it is time to return to this space. I had a really, really good break. It was a good thing. And it's good to remember what you love about something you've been doing for (exactly) five years. 

I don't think I'll spend a lot time with what we did. I'll just jump back in with what we're doing

home.

While I was away from here, I kept a private space online, all my own. No one knew about it. I shared it with no one. But it was an experiment. I wanted to know what it would be like if I had a space for only me. 

And I learned that I like marking time. I like writing things down. Remembering. I like to-do lists, and favorite quotes, remembering how I canned the tomatoes, and how much drama went in to losing that big front tooth. Sometimes, I like to post without pictures. Sometimes I like just a few words. 

It was refreshing. And I hope to bring a lot of that back here.

hi. i'm home.

So hi! Hello! This is me waving over the fence. Letting you know I'm back from vacation. And I'm feeling good.

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